Coming attractions...

Stay tuned! Next month will feature the ravings of a woman celebrating the 20th anniversary of her 21st birthday!!

Wait for it...

Whew!! I'd like to thank the kid to whom I was Sissy Blabbermouth for not saying anything to Mom. I was totally sweating the whole, "Mom, Mrs. Stephanie said she means it when she says no, unlike you" thing. Apparently my life has been spared again. Thank you, LORD!!
Perhaps I'll learn my lesson this time. Right.

Oops, I did it again!

I know I'm not the only one this has happened to. I know I'm in good company. So this post is dedicated to all those friends out there in cyberspace who have a mouth that's really too big for their brains.



We have lots of friends who have lots of kids...and lots of different parenting styles. Different parents=different rules. Different parents=different personalities. I am NOT saying I'm an expert on child-rearing because I am sooooo not! I am saying that I've learned quite a bit about what to do and what NOT to do. It's kind of like when you planned your wedding and you went to tons of your friends weddings...the stuff you didn't like/didn't want to duplicate made a longer list than the stuff you liked. (Does this make sense?) Anyway...same thing applies. I've learned a whole lot more of what doesn't work regarding kids. The BIGGEST thing I've learned is to KEEP MY MOUTH SHUT when I disagree with what another parent does/ignores/tolerates/etc. For the most part. (cue blunder)



Here's where the gaff happens. (I'm going to change a few details to protect the innocent here because I really like this mom and want to keep her friendship). So her child is playing with Evan at my house one afternoon. The playdate is winding down. It's close to the time when I'll be dropping the kid back home. I give the old "10 min. left before we leave" routine. Followed by the "5 min. left". When go time actually arrives, I give the direction to get shoes on so we can take Friend home. Evan and Friend don't move. I play the "mom card" and step in with, "You'll do it now. It's time to go." You'd think that would make said children hop right up and do what their told. But no.

At this point, some folks would repeat the directive, either patiently or pleadingly. Not me. I step in front of the tv, turn off the tv and turn back to see Evan hurriedly putting on shoes. Friend, on the other hand, stares at me like a bump on a stump. AAAaaannnnnddd, cue mouth: "When I say stop, I mean it...unlike your mother." OMG! Was that last part OUT LOUD?? Being me, I didn't mumble it. Nope. Loud and proud, baby! Selling it to the cheap seats! Friend simply gets up from the couch at a snail's pace and then proceeds to look for shoes. I find them first, grab them and hustle both kiddos out the door to the car before I can really feel guilty about what I said.

At some point, I may need to seriously consider reading Dale Carnegie's book, How to Win Friends and Influence People.

Man, Blow the Dust Off the Keyboard!!

Turn around twice and suddenly you're 3 months into the new year with not posts. What's up with that?!?

January...Blur
February...Blur
March...Blur

Oh no he di'in't!

If you spend enough time with someone, eventually you will see their dark side. Not the bad temper. Not the frustration. The dark side: the judgmental snobby side. Even people of excellent character have one. I fully embrace my dark side. I can definitely be Snarky McSnarkington and enjoy it. It's the people who act like they don't have one that actually have the worst kind. The high & mighty self-righteous kind. While I've had my suspicions about the dark side of one particular person, I've never really seen it. In the last 20 years of the relationship we share, I haven't once seen it fully exposed. Like I said, he hints at it. Today, however, the veil was ripped from my eyes. Who is that masked man you ask? My father-in-law! My sweet, short, full of humor father-in-law!

I've always been a little insecure about the way Bobby's family views me and my family. (It's like that in every family, I think.) Nonetheless, you're familiar with the scenario. The new girlfriend in the family (1989 was a very good year!) really wants to impress her new beau's parents & sibs. New girlfriend then becomes fiancee and still wants to not only impress, but also please the parents & sibs. Fiancee becomes wife and now it is CRUCIAL that the now in-laws LOVE her... that she not give them ANY fodder for ANY misunderstanding or judgment of any kind. These are the people she has to celebrate holidays, etc. with for the next 100 years. No one wants any awkwardness or bad blood. Well, in my 20 years with the Popes (2 dating, 2 engaged, 16 married) my efforts to "contain the crazy" so as to avoid "the look" and "the talk", I have actually managed the exact opposite of what I wanted. I wanted peace and a low profile. What I have? Awkward unrest & misunderstanding. WHY DIDN'T I JUST LET THE CRAZY OUT IN THE FIRST PLACE? I could've been labeled fun and quirky and now life would be a big comfy couch.

Hence the veil-ripping of today. I was with my FIL at a local bookstore (owned by close friends, who were there as well) doing some Christmas shopping. He wanted my help in choosing a couple of books for Evan. He announces to the friend, "I'm buying books for him. I absolutely refuse to buy him stuff. His OTHER grandparents buy him stuff. Too much stuff. He has so much stuff he doesn't know what to do with it all." Alrighty then. The OTHER grandparents being MY parents. Um, hello Dave? I'm standing RIGHT HERE! But wait, there's more...he adds a little caveat: "I'm not dogging your dad." Really. Odd, because THAT'S WHAT IT SOUNDED LIKE!

I managed to keep a calm face. I excused myself under the guise of needing to look for a gift for a SIL. I was blinking back tears by the time I reached the front of the store. WTH! I wanted to scream at, I mean, inform him that his OTHER grandparents give him their time. They give him books. They play games with him, not torture him with tickling (which he hates). They can HEAR him when he shares what's going on in his life. (Oh, right, it's not a hearing problem you have, it's a speech discrimination problem).

Perhaps I should've said, "Thanks for the insight into what you really think about my parents." If he only knew how much I've wanted to say but haven't! All for the sake of peace. Well, look out Dave (and Carol, too)! The gloves are coming off!

There she goes AGAIN!

It's happened AGAIN! I just need to vent so stand back. I HATE BEING THE THIRD WHEEL!!! IT'S MY SESSION, TOO!! WHY SHOULD I FEEL LIKE THE P-I-A LITTLE SISTER?? IF I COULD AFFORD PRIVATE SESSIONS, I'D BE TAKING THEM IN A HEARTBEAT!!!

There, that's over. Now off to my shower where I will cry silent tears of anger, frustration and maybe a bit of shame.

Cheers to another Monday...

This is...awkward!

Has this ever happened to you? You're standing around waiting, for a bus (location changed to protect the guilty) let's say. You're with two other people, one a guy and the other a girl. Suddenly, you are the third wheel, the one standing and gawking while the other two are flirting giddily while supposedly "discussing" a particular topic. Giggling and playful touching. AWKWARD! Especially since one of the parties involved is older and married. SUPER AWKWARD!!

This happened to me today. I won't say where, but it sure wasn't at school and it wasn't at home. If you know me well enough you can probably guess the other place where I spend a bulk of my time. There I am, waiting patiently and then feeling stupid, like an annoying little sister who has just caught her sibling & boyfriend kissing. EWWWW! Oh to have said, "Get a room!" and then seen their reactions. This isn't the first time the older, married woman has sort of thrown herself at the young man. Since she has a record it's bound to happen again. What am I supposed to do? Besides make gagging noises, I mean.

Maybe I should ask Dear Abby.